G D Cadd9 D G D Cadd9 D
It's amazing how pretty you looked on that night
G D Cadd9 D G D Cadd9 D
Your skirt was so short and your top was so tight
Cadd9 D
I bought you a drink and we danced on the floor
G D Cadd9 D
We pulled and you came back to mine for some more
G D Cadd9 D
Your skirt ended up on the living room chairs
G D Cadd9 D
And your top and your bra, they came off on the stairs
G D Cadd9
And though you looked fit with your clothes on
D
Man I was a fool...
Cadd9 D G D Cadd9 D
Cos you look like shit, when you wear nothing at all
G D Cadd9 D G D Cadd9 D
Oh the clothes that you wore looked a million dollars
G D Cadd9 D G D Cadd9 D
But the body beneath, it looked just like Rik Waller's
Cadd9 D
The make-up you wear is a clever disguise
G D Cadd9 D
To hide your moustache and the squint in your eyes
G D Cadd9 D
Your cellulite's dreadful, you're covered in zits and
G D Cadd9 D
Your stomach's about as defined as quicksand
G D Cadd9 D
If I'm being honest your tits are unacceptably small
Cadd9 D G D Cadd9 D
So you look like shit, when you wear nothing at all
G D Cadd9 D G D Cadd9 D
When we went back to mine I was up for a shag
G D Cadd9 D G D Cadd9 D
In the bedroom I realise you're a dumpy old slag
Cadd9 D
Your pubes reach your navel and they cover your thighs
G D Cadd9 D
Didn't know they made arses that size
G D Cadd9 D
When we met on that night, I could swear that I never
G D Cadd9 D
Would've guessed you're a female Andrew Lloyd Webber
G D Cadd9 D
The hair on your chest's a bit endocrinological
Cadd9 D G D
And you look like shit, when you wear nothing at all
G D Cadd9 D
Your teeth are all yellow with bloody great gaps so
G D Cadd9 D
Your face is a picture by Pablo Picasso
G D Cadd9 D
I can see that your arse has it's own gravitational pull
Cadd9 D G D
And you look like shit, when you wear nothing at all