Em
I've been feeling dull as a coat hanger
C G A
Pretty as a picture of a patient on a fresh iv
Em C G A B7
Giddy as a gangbanger with a set of sutures where his magic johnson ought to be
Em Am F#dim B7
Yes i'll tell you just the thing you need to be the next big thing
Em Am F#dim
Let's start in with a test of your intelligence
B7
And zest for the counter-productive
Em Am F#dim
Up and down and roundabout and out the back
B7 Em
And keep your mouth shut tight
Am F#dim B7
The lights are staying out but no sweat I've got aim like a mack truck
Em Am F#dim B7
Guess how many fingers ok guess how many more i can fit there
Em Am F#dim B7
Guess right get the toaster but you know, miss, guessing gets you nowhere
A B
I've been baking cakes for the enemy
C G A
I've been dying to find out the hard way
A B
Ive been taking friends to the alleyway
C D
Two down now but who's counting anyway?
Em Am F#dim B7
Yes I can do everything you need from out of my new SUV
Em Am F#dim B7
All my work is guaranteed to last the length of your recovery
Em Am F#dim B7
Put away those pliers honey trust me cause I know the options
Em Am F#dim B7
How about a nine-month long vacation and a two-foot coffin
A B
I've been getting up close and intimate
C G A
Some close calls but I'm getting into it
A B
In some states they say you can burn for it
C D
But ill burn that bridge when i get to it
D C# C B
It's not a bad thing
D C# C B
To get professional
D C# C B
It's got a nice ring
D C# C B
Mandy goes to med school!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
A B
I've been taking tips from the government
C G A
I've been getting damn good at hiding it
A B
Fifty bucks a month ought to cover it
C D
Two down now but who's gonna notice it?
A B
And if you show up and I am unavailable
C D
My partner brian would love to take care of you
D C# C B
He is a nice man
D C# C B
Thoroughly reliable
D C# C B
He's in a rock band
D C# C B
And he goes to med school.....
Em Am F#dim B7 (x2)
End on Em