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I met him in a crowded room
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Where people go to drink away their gloom
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He sat me down and so began, the story of a charmless man
A Ab Bass F# A Ab Bass F#
Educated the expensive way, he knows his claret from his beaujolais
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I think he's like to of been Ronnie Kray
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But then nature didn't make him that way
A
He thinks he's educated, airs those family shares
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Will protect him that we will respect him
A
He moves in circles of friends
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Who just pretend that they like him
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He does the same to them, And when you put it all together
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There's the model of a charmless man
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He knows the swingers and their calvarly
Says he can get in anywhere for free
I began to go a little cross eyed
And from this charmless man I just had to hide
He talks at speeds he gets nosebleeds
He doesn't see his days
Are tumbling down upon him
And yet he tries so hard to please
He's just so keen for you to listen
But no one is listening
And when you put it all together
There's the model of a charmless man